There are many ways we can say “I remember and I loved this person.” Here are some ideas provided by our friends that can be utilized during an anniversary, a birthday or any gathering to honor your loved one.

Please share your original ideas on Share Your Thoughts, and we will post them regularly so others may share in creative ways to memorialize their loved ones also. Here are some topics to consider:

Holidays, Birthdays & Anniversaries
How have you observed these occasions after a loss?

Final Burial Events
What ideas can you share for unique and beautiful burials and similar events?

Community Events
What events in your area have you started or participated in to celebrate your loved one?

Changing Traditions –
How have your traditions and observances changed to incorporate remembrance of your loved one?

Symbols & Rituals
In which symbols and rituals have you found comfort and meaning (i.e. butterflies, flowers, altars?)

Nature
How you have kept your loved one’s memory alive through a garden, memorial planting or other tie to nature?

Non-Profit/Activist Commemorations
What causes have you found especially significant?

Here are some simple & easy ideas to start:

• Light a candle in their memory
• Create a memory book (scrapbook) of photos to distribute to family members
• Make a donation in “memory of” to your loved ones favorite charity
• Wear photo jewelry of your loved one
• Create a memorial scholarship in their honor
• Write stories or poetry about their life and your memories
• Play their favorite music or create a CD of their favorite songs
• Make a quilt from their favorite clothing

From our friends.....

Make Their Favorite Foods
Every year for my sister’s birthday (she died three years ago), we get the family together along with her friends to eat her favorite foods and have a birthday party. My sister, Claire, loved meat loaf, scalloped potatoes, creamed peas and chocolate chip cookies! We share stories of great times we had with her, eat, and have a fun time celebrating her life. This is a wonderful gathering because so often we mourn their loss when we should be celebrating their life on the day they were born.

Have Friends and Family Write Memories
A really great idea which can be done for any occasion or no occasion at all is a memory book. My friend has all of her husband’s friends and family write a small story about a time or a moment they had with her husband who passed. She makes copies of these stories and puts them together in books. She does this every year and sends them out to the people who wrote them around the time of his birthday. It keeps his memory alive and you hear great stories that you never would have known before.

Plant a Tree
For lost loved ones in my family, we like to plant a tree in their name and
watch it grow over the years. We have done it in our backyards, places our family members liked to go (with permission of the property owners, of course), or anywhere. There are even companies that you can pay to plant a tree for you somewhere else that needs it. It gives to the world, and to my family's hearts.

Write Names on Rocks
On the Anniversary of my cousin's passing we all went to the cemetery and my Aunt had bought a bag of smooth rocks about 4 inches long for us to write our names on and place around the gravestone. I liked that idea because it was nice to see the names of all of his loved ones around him and had beautiful symbolic meaning. She later cemented them into a heart shape and it looks really great.

Candle Holders
A very simple idea that I love is to give out candles on a loved ones memorial, birthday, or just for the simple thought of it. You can write their name on a candle holder that the candle can be replaced in. Everyone can light it at the memorial or you can light it at home when you think about your loved one. I think that candles have a warm feeling and it helps if they are larger so they last longer.

Birthday Cake
Even though my mom passed away many years ago, we had a birthday party for her with her picture superimposed onto a cake. They do this at many bakeries and it is a very simple but nice thing to have when you are singing Happy Birthday. It was so wonderful to see her beautiful face again.

Skits
We have a pretty outrageous family and so it is not surprising that we came up with this silly and fun idea for the birthday of our Grandma who passed. We wrote short little skits about the significant points in her life and made a cute little play out of them. The kids in our family were the actors and it was all very hysterical. It turned a time that could have been very sad into a lot of fun, and knowing Grammy she was having a blast watching it.

Collage
At my brother’s memorial there was a giant photo collage of him throughout his life. It was great to remember and see how many wonderful times he had and that we had with him. It brings back so many memories and it draws away from the fact that we lost him for a little bit to understand how much he did get to experience and live life.

Champagne Splits
My nephew recently passed and for his 21st birthday his mom threw a party for all of his friends just like he would have done if he were here. She gave away splits of champagne and made labels to go over the original one’s that said his name and Happy 21st Birthday. Everybody got to pop them at the same time and it was lots of fun.

Candles in Champagne Glasses
For my sister’s 21st birthday I put candles in champagne glasses. I made stars to slip onto the stem and wrote on them in silver and gold sharpies “Happy Birthday Sarah.” They turned out really cute and most people I gave them to still have them.

Light Candles Wherever You Might Be
My family is spread around all of the United States. When the time of my Mom’s first memorial came around I was upset that we wouldn’t all be together. My Mother loved the scent of lavender and I saw these simple lavender scented candles at the market. I decided to buy one for each of my family members. I wrote my Mother’s name on them and the expression “your light still shines” and sent them out. I added a note to light them on the day of her memorial and keep them lit throughout the day if they so wished. I really felt like it brought us together knowing that as far away from each other as we were, everyone was tied together by this common sign of remembrance and could even smell her favorite scent.

Buy Toys for Unfortunate Children
For Christmas every year I love to buy and give toys to “Toys for Tots.” I can shop for toys as I would for my child that passed from cancer a couple years ago. It is rewarding because you know you are making a child smile who probably needs a smile more than most. You can also donate them at your local children’s hospital or often at the Library.

Make an Ornament Every Year
Christmas can be the hardest time when it comes to missing a child or any loved one. I make an ornament every year to put on the tree for my little brother who is no longer with us. Some of the ornaments have his picture inside a glass bulb with decorations outside of it and others I painted things he enjoyed such as a baseball. This makes his memory special with each passing year.

Make a donation in their remembrance
My favorite thing to do for Christmas or even Birthdays is to send a check to Feed the Children or whatever charity organization that you prefer in their memory. I can’t think of a better way to take an occasion that is often sad and turn it into a way to help others who are even less fortunate.

Let Balloons Go
When we meet at the cemetery for my Aunt’s Birthday we let loose a balloon for every year she is turning. It is a really pretty sight.

Slideshow
I can not explain how thankful I am to have a video that my Mom put together and I watch every year on the day of my Father’s memorial or anytime I want to. It is a DVD slideshow of really happy photos of my Dad with beautiful music playing in the background. There are also many video companies that can produce them.

Crafts
I am not very good at it but for Christmas or Birthdays I like to create, paint, build, bake, do anything for the one I lost. It doesn’t matter what it is or how it turns out but I channel my love into whatever I’m doing. It makes me happy and I know that no matter how silly it is they appreciate watching me do it.

Flower for every year
A very easy way that I show my love on my sister’s Birthday is to get a flower for every year she is turning. I bring them to the cemetery and it is a peaceful place to just sit and be alone with her.

Write or make a card
I still write or sometimes make a card for my deceased Mom for various holidays. I sometimes write little memories about holidays we spent together and fun times we had and it cheers me up.

Cook their specialty
My Grandma was a really great cook and we loved going to her house for holidays. Now that she is no longer with us we put together a cookbook of her specialties and gave them to our family members. When holidays roll around different family members bring a dish that Grandma would have made and it is a nice way to keep her with us.

Please share your original ideas on Share Your Thoughts, and we will post them regularly so others may share in creative ways to memorialize their loved ones also.